I am a 22 year old union member who worked my way up to project manager. I went to business school. My wife has been a nurse for four years and received a Bachelor of Science degree in nursing from a local college.
Prior to working in nursing, she was part-time, full-time and home-based. We have four children. In addition to a salary, my job provides me with a vehicle, gasoline, telephone, vacation, pension and health insurance.
Your position pays an hourly rate and is roughly equal to 401 (k). Your salary is roughly 65% of my salary. She has always been one who measures what she gets by what I get in terms of possessions, experience, and expenses, and believes it should be the same.
I am thrifty and money saver where she likes to spend money and feels that she should be able to get anything she wants. I take care of all the bills, payments, and money up to balance, and she spends willingly.
“‘I take care of all the bills, payments, and money until the budget is balanced and she spends willingly. ‘”
If we split all household expenses in the middle – including her cell phone, car insurance, gas bills, household expenses, groceries – she would have little left at the end of the month.
In addition, she will soon have to pay a student loan for her studies, which makes up 13% of her monthly income. If I measure their expenses in relation to their income, their answer is that I should pay more of the expenses.
I agreed to this, but I already cover part of your phone bill, car loan, gasoline bill, vehicle insurance, and all of your health insurance, with my expenses for these items all being covered by my work.
She said I make more money, so I should cover the extras, and yet my monthly expenses are far less than hers. Do you think it’s fair to expect her to take over her student loan payments and also reduce her impulsive spending?
A spoonful of sugar did not help the drug. It has only led to more spending, less saving and an increased sense of entitlement. It’s hard to turn around and tell her the sugar bowl is now empty and she needs to find another way to pay her bills, but you have little choice.
A Salary of a nurse ranges from around $ 60,230 in Alabama to $ 87,840 in New York. Your wife is a nurse who is severely underpaid as all nurses have their challenging and often life saving roles, but she will not solve this by spending too much money and letting you do the bill. Your student loan is a good place to start.
Put everything on paper: salary, expenses, pocket money, student loans. If necessary, create a pie chart. You both need to look at how much money you are pouring in, what your monthly commitments are, how much extra-curricular money you are spending and, most importantly, what percentage of your income is related to it.
“This is an opportunity for you to press reset and have a conversation about wants, needs, and personal responsibility.”
You can even choose to pool your resources and stick to the same formula for monthly expenses, savings and free time. This can help your wife realize that you are a team and that it is not about one person having more than the other and earning more because they have a lower salary.
For example, personal finance site NerdWallet endorsed the 50/30/20 budget. “With this formula, you aim to spend 50% of your net wages on needs like rent and insurance, 30% on desires like gym memberships and vacations, and 20% on debt payments and savings,” it says. Your “fun money” comes from the rest.
The biggest takeaway here: It’s not just about your wife’s student loan, although it’s an important consideration. This is an opportunity for you to press reset and have a conversation about wants, needs, and personal responsibility. Managing a budget is an exercise we can Everyone make at home. You, your wife, and the moneyist.
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